Approaches to NVC


See also: Core Commitments, Key Assumptions & Intentions & Self-Assessment Matrix 

Other NVC Learning Venues

George Washington bridge, approach from the New Jersey side.

Daniel Schwen via Wikimedia Commons


“Nonviolent Communication is an awareness discipline masquerading as a communication process.”

~ Kit Miller

  Beneath courtesy of the work of Miki Kashtan

Approaches to NVC:  What “is” NVC?

Below are some ideas people have of what NVC “is”.

(Some may have combinations of these ideas or other ideas.
You might add some of your own…)
Principle Related Needs Strategies
NVC as “life in the moment”, play, joy Joy Focus on what I want, is it joyful for me
NVC as self-empowerment & self-responsibility Choice and power Focus on my needs and finding strategies to meet them; mourning unmet needs; making requests of self & others to move towards the life I want
NVC as self-empathic, self-compassionate process Self-connection, self-acceptance, learning to live what is (even unmet needs) Focus on self-empathy; compassion for myself
NVC as a process for authentic connection with oneself and others Authenticity, vulnerability Focus on what’s most true for me and share from the heart
NVC as a way to embody compassion, connection Compassion Focus on responding with empathy
NVC as a way to hold everyone’s needs with care Harmony, peace, integrity Focusing on both people’s needs
NVC as a way to be present to joy and suffering:  to see ‘what is’

Peace, liberation, joy, understanding

Focusing on the life of the moment in oneself and the world, transforming only ideas of what ‘should’ be
NVC as inner freedom Choice, growth Recognizing and acting from true needs instead of impulse, habits, ‘shoulds’ or rebellion
NVC as non-attachment to the outcomes of interactions with people Learning, discovery, joy Freely offer our needs as gifts and focus on hearing others’ needs as a gift to us
NVC as a tool for living in line with my values and being true to myself Authenticity, integrity, transparency, honesty, care, courage Choosing actions that honor my values and needs

Courtesy of BayNVC/Kashtan


7 favourite books: Nonviolent Communication

See additional NVC book reviews here.

One of my favorite NVC books:‘s

An excerpt from above:

Rosenberg via Oren Jay Sofer


For more as to NVC & Social Change Agency:

Politics, Climate & NVC

See also: Spiritual Basis of NVC

Miki’s Writings | The Fearless Heart

& Teleseminars

The Fool card from the Visconti-Sforza Tarot deck.
(courtesy of Wikimedia Commons)


Four “Mediate One’s Life” contexts:

  • Internal. The conflict is within, between aspects of yourself.
  • Self-other/interpersonal. The conflict is between you and someone else.
  • Informal. You lend your mediation skills to a conflict without being explicitly asked to do so.
  • Formal. You mediate a conflict, intentionally, and at the request or with the express agreement of others.

See also: NVC Mediation